Thursday, March 5, 2009

doctor's appointments=tears

Maddie with our nurse Amanda from Dr. Allred's office. She's always in tears around Amanda which about puts poor Amanda in tears too! She's been our nurse for all 3 kids since birth; every shot, temperature, and measurement has been taken by her. She's the sweetest!

We've spent a lot of time in doctors offices this week with a fussy girl. It's Maddie's least favorite place to be. Tuesday was Maddie's nephrology appointment in Seattle to follow-up on her kidney issues. She had a renal ultrasound and visit with Dr. Jackson and Dr. Hingorani, and thanks to a glitch in scheduling our "big plans" to shop didn't work out due to spending most of our day at Children's. Kidney wise, her left one showed some growth and is now in the range of being "somewhat" normal, which was great news. On ultrasound, they can't really tell the function but due to that it grew, they think it must be working. She is still being treated for reflux with the Bacterim and they don't have any plans of taking her off of that until she's at least 2 years old due to the risk of infection from UTI's and being a cardiac kid. It was a big relief to know that her kidney's look good and the ureters have improved on ultrasound. Yeah!!! She was in tears throughout the entire ultrasound but flirted with Dr. Jackson at the end of the appointment, after she realized there was no "hurt" involved, it was cute.

For the past month, her cardiologist and I have been in touch regarding Maddie's sats. They have been on the low end, consistently hanging anywhere between 76-82. Her sats have never been very high, even after her Glenn, so Maddie has a maintenance heart catheterization coming up in 2 weeks. If you're not familiar with what a cath is, you can read about it here. Dr. Vernon wants to rule out whether she needs a little "tune-up" with ballooning or a possible stent if there is narrowing or scarring from her surgeries. Maddie's pulmonary arteries have always been small and narrow, so they may need tweeking to get those sats up and more blood flow through them. We need them to grow! Of course I don't want to have her go through this, there is always risk with a cath and she'll have to be put under and intubated. She's doing so well and I don't want anything to jeopardize this! But it will be nice to see what's going on in that heart of hers since this is the most accurate way of diagnosis. We may learn that everything is just fine and her sats are just going to hang on the lower end. So, that's where we're at with her heart.

Last but not least, Maddie ran a fever all day yesterday. She also had to go in for her Synagis shots to Dr. Allred's. To rule out whether this was a UTI or not, she also ended up having her bladder cathed to get a good urine sample. It went smooth, came back fine, and she received her 2 shots, which btw, totals $3984.30 a month on our insurance EOB's!!! We get to pay $864.48 of that...yikes, we'll meet our deductible early this year due to those costly shots! (Had to share the real price since back in a December post I estimated the cost). It has kept her healthy from RSV though...especially since so many little ones in our town have had it this winter! The boys were with us as well and Cade also got some attention from Dr. Allred since he's had such a bad cough and refuses to eat lately. Of course, it's a viral thing so we're riding out all of the bugs we've acquired lately and hoping Maddie can beat this too before her heart cath procedure in 2 weeks. So two days in the doctor's offices at 3 hours each was enough for Miss Maddie and the rest of us! She knows what is up now and just cries from the minute we get there... she's still running a fever, is not herself and only wants held, so I had time to post, and one-handed at that!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Gracie


March 20, 2008 - March 2, 2009
Our lives were touched by this little sweet'heart'...
Gracie, you'll forever be in our hearts.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Prayer Request

Heart babies are always in need of prayer but a few of our special friends really could use them right now...Gracie received a new heart yesterday but is having some major complications. Her family's blog is the first one I ever found (from a strangers comment left on our blog), just days after Gracie was born and while we were still in the hospital with Maddie after her first surgery. Her mom had many links to other heart babies on their blog and this is where many new friendships began. I have followed Gracie these past 11 months and she's pulled through so much. Our girls are just a week apart so my heart is so heavy for them and sweet Gracie Girl...they have had a very difficult "heart journey".

Karlee, Daniel and Joshua are still in the CICU recovering from their transplants as well. Daniel was put on ECMO and has been having a tough time...please remember these sweet babies and their families in your prayers tonight.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Not another one...

Look what I found Miss Maddie up to the other day...she found Cade's spiderman mask and was eagerly trying to put it on her head! She has seen more of Cade in his spiderman suit than clothes, so I wasn't surprised that she knew what to do with the spidey mask! And of course, I quickly grabbed my camera to capture it. Good thing her birthday is coming up...the girl needs "girly" things to play with and possibly some "baby sized" dress up clothes?!? Do they make such a thing? I don't think I can handle another superhero in our house so bring on the princesses!!!

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Hearts Day!

Happy Valentine's Day!!! Bryan and I celebrated our Valentines day with a couple's massage and lunch at Cave B! The kids enjoyed their afternoon at Grandma and Papa Allred's house too. It was fun, relaxing, and gave us lots of time to reflect on this past year. Heart awareness day is not complete without mentioning the doctor's and nurses who have saved our daughter's life...I hold them on a high pedestal, trust & love them, and give them thanks from the bottom of my heart. Their job has to be so difficult and they always seem at ease and upbeat by lightening the situation when it needs to be and giving unending support when we, as parents, need to express our worries, concerns and ask our "millions" of questions. Our love and thanks to Seattle Children's: Dr. Vernon, Dr. McMullan, Dr. Chun, Dr. Jones, Dr. Baden, Elizabeth Hadland, Nurses: Ann, Maggie, JoAnna N., Rayma, Micheal, Miranda, Jayna, Carlotta, Diane, Meghan, and so many more!

To wrap it up, here's a CHD awareness video made by a 21 year old CHD survivor. Lauren has Tricuspid Atresia and is a Hypoplastic Right Heart like Maddie. She's had all 3 surgeries and is currently in college. What an inspiration for us to find adults with hearts only "custom made" by God!

This week has been extra exciting & exhausting for some of our heart friends too...Daniel (I've spoke of him before, Maddie's first NICU roommate) finally got his heart after waiting for so long, and baby Karlee got a heart transplant the following day! Seattle Children's has been a very busy place with 5 transplants already this year and these two were a day apart. Last year, they performed 15...which is simply amazing. We're so happy for their families and ask that you include them in your prayers, as well as the families who are grieving or still waiting for their miracle (Lindsay, Owen and Gracie G.). Unfortunately, a life is lost to save another...

Friday, February 13, 2009

Brotherly Love



Before Maddie's arrival, I stressed and cried over how this would affect the boys. The life they knew was quickly going to change by not only having a new baby in our family but a high maintenance little thing with health problems. We carefully explained that the baby had a broken heart and would need to be in the hospital to have it fixed. It was tough to do because we didn't want to cause unnecessary fear. Since, we didn't know ourselves what the outcome would be. Then she decided to come and early to boot! The boys were quickly thrown around between grandparents and aunts & uncles and they handled it great. Bryan and I probably had a tougher time than they did. Since I'm a stay-at-home mom, I just didn't know how they'd handle me not being in the picture since I'm with them 24/7. They were well-taken care of, entertained to the highest, and put on a pedestal after their sister's birth. We did get to see them weekly with family bringing them back and forth to Seattle. Let's just say we had a little un-spoiling to do after we got home! They made many fun memories in the midst of our "crisis" and their memories of Maddie really began after we brought her home. The baby they'd visited in the ICU wasn't a part of their life yet and the tubes, wires, and her surroundings made this so. They had little connection with her until she was home with us. Jace quickly took on his role as the big brother, trying to help in anyway by even entertaining Cade since I was always busy either feeding, pumping, or trying to just catch up on my chores. Their bond as brothers really grew during that time away from us. They depended on each other and one wouldn't go anywhere without the other. Caden had a tougher time, his "spot" as my baby was taken and he was a little lost. He was extra needy, very emotional and attached to my mom, Nany, since she seemed to fill what he needed from me and she was around a lot to help. To this day, they have a very special bond. As everything settled, I think he regained some of the trust he'd lost in me, figured out his spot was not taken just shifted to a new role and 11 months later, he's a proud big brother and adores his little sister to the extreme that we have to often say things like: "Cade, that's enough hugs...enough kisses...leave your sister alone!" Things have changed for them with Maddie's arrival in the family; whether it's being separated from us with the hospital stays and appointments, no preschool or parties or playdates because of sick kids, or by just staying at home simply to avoid exposure to illness. They've learned at an early age about empathy, sacrifice, fear, prayer, happiness in little things, teamwork, and they've been troopers from the start. I'm so very proud of them and Maddie's such a lucky girl to have Jace and Caden as her big brothers. This heart journey has been an easy one compared to some and Maddie has not been "typical" for a baby with only a half-heart. We've been lucky and so very blessed, and I attribute her toughness and determination, traits she's gotten from her big brothers. A CHD has changed our life but I can say with 100% honesty that it's only been for the better with our family!

Here's a few quotes from Jace and Cade regarding their sister or "heart stuff" that I've jotted down over the past year...
Jace:
* "Mom, I take good care of Maddie and tertect her because her heart is broken."
* "Hey, I've been here before, it's the hospital! Mom, just drive to the whale parking!" (when we went to see baby Tripp at the Moses Lake hospital not Seattle Children's, doesn't all hospital parking lots have animal parking lots?)
* "Caden, if you don't eat your dinner, mom will put a feeding tube in your nose like Maddie's!"
* When we celebrated baby Annabelle's birthday by sending a pink balloon to heaven, he insisted that "her name needs to be on it so nobody else will take it. It's for her birthday party."
* At lunch one day, Jace was looking at Maddie and asked if I'd given her a purple popsicle since her lips were blue...they even "catch" her moments of blueness and make sure to report it :o)

Cade:
* "When Maddie grows up her heart won't be broken anymore. And her heart is red, my favorite color"
* After cousin Kylie was born and their first visit with her at our house, Cade pulled up her shirt to see if she had a scar like Maddie's...Aunt Jessica and I explained that Kylie's heart didn't need fixed. So cute (and a little sad) that in his mind, he probably thought every baby needed their heart fixed!
* He's my "puke/poop patrol guy" by always yelling..."Mom, Maddie puked again!" or "Maddie stinks really bad Mom!"

And this post is not complete without mentioning that today Maddie is 11 months old! She's crawling everywhere like a mad-woman, pulling up on the furniture and she just figured out how to walk while holding onto mommy's hands. Cruising around the room with mom is at the top of her list now! Her favorite thing to say is "huh-oh" over and over again and she likes to do "so big" by putting her hands up in the air. In one more month...our baby girl will be SO BIG...1 year old!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

A poem to share

Somewhere...someplace... today...
A family is waiting to hear...
Is something wrong with their baby?
The answers aren't quite clear...
This family has entered an unwanted world...
And they just don't know what to expect...
Somewhere...someplace... today...
They first heard the words: heart defect.
And how they hoped this was not true...
And thought... this cannot be...
I too... know just how this feels...
For one day...this was me.
Somewhere...someplace...today...
A man and a woman embrace...
Their baby is in surgery...
They long to see her face...
They haven't got to hold her yet...
Without...a cord or line...
They pace the room awaiting news...
And hope she'll be just fine.
Prayers fill this busy waiting room...
And mom and dad are scared...
Somewhere...someplace..today...
The tiniest hearts are repaired.
Somewhere...someplace...today...
A child's growing fast...
Smiling, laughing, thriving...
His mom thinks...can this last?
It's almost easy...to forget...
That anything is wrong...
Somewhere...someplace...today...
Her child seems so strong.
Somewhere...someplace...today...
A little boy fights...just to live...
A father holds his tiny hand...
His love...all he can give...
The doctor's are all baffled...
They fear that he might die...
Somewhere...someplace...today...
A family says goodbye...
Somewhere...someplace...each year...
More than 40,000 families will see...
What it means...when something's wrong...
They'll face a CHD.
Today...for just a moment...
Stop...remember...reflect...
Make time to tell someone you know...
"I've been changed by a heart defect".

~Stephanie Husted, Braeden's mommy (Feb. 6 2007)

Isn't her poetry so awesome? I've shared a few others of hers in the past and she's one talented writer!